Thanks for your support so far. ♥ If you do buy a copy, I would greatly appreciate reviews as well!
You can read sample pages here. Please share as much as you can to make an English version possible Thank you!
Publisher: Tokyopop Germany
168 pages, paperback, ages 16 and up, contains sexual themes and strong language.
*reblogs the shit out of this because want English version so baaaad augh please c’mon guys help me out here it’s SO GOOD MAN*
Laz’ab was actually spawned after a comment I received on DeviantArt several years ago, wherein someone remarked that all the characters I created were the same: they were all generally happy-go-lucky, and usually some kind of gangster, pirate, or smuggler. While this is especially true for roleplay characters—because guess what, if I’m going to roleplay them I want to create someone I will enjoy roleplaying, even if that seems kind of “samey”—I still decided to try do something about it.
The result was a character that strayed dangerously close to the overdramatic, wangsty, troubled, and/or serial-murderer-rapist stereotype that I used to create a lot back in high school (hooray for teenage angst). I wanted to avoid sliding into these generic “deadly-but-attractive” psychopaths I see in a lot of mainstream media (read: anime) so I set about researching serial killers in real life. I spent at least six months poring through websites and documentaries on prolific killers from Dahmer to Gein, and even to Manson, before I felt confident enough to even attempt roleplaying Laz’ab “properly”.
I wanted to try to get into the mind of a psychopath, and while I will never know why these people do the things they do, studying real-life serial killers and drawing on the similarities many of them shared (ie: lack of emotion/empathy, lack of remorse, sexual arousal from pain, impotence/sexual deviousness, triggered mood swings, awkwardness in public/relationships, troubled early life, etc.) help to keep me on track when playing him.
It also makes for some disturbing nightmare material.
The final decision to include paranoid schizophrenia stems from my own deep-seated fear of mental illnesses. If you want to make someone frightening, they should be able to scare you first, right? The thought of being trapped in your own mind, unable to control your own brain as it tells you things or shows you things and distorts reality until you can’t function anymore terrifies me.
Absolutely terrifies me.
Schizophrenia is a mental disorder that I have seen “abused” a lot in popular media—it is portrayed as something “cool” or “unique”, slapped onto a character to make them stand out. In reality anyone can get it from something as simple as trauma in a bar fight, or even from simply hitting a certain age and drawing the short straw. And there is no cure for it; there are drugs to quieten the voices or reduce brain activity but once you have it it’s there until you die.
TL;DR: Technically speaking, since his behaviour is an exaggeration of some of the heinous crimes committed by real, living, breathing, human beings, Laz’ab is not entirely fictional …
But here is Laz’ab in a nutshell.
And Laz’ab as a witch.
Just in case you needed more nightmare fodder.
THIS IS HOW YOU MAKE A DAMN GOOD CHARACTER.
Seriously, the amount of research Shamine tells me she’s done for Laz sometimes is just so staggering, and yet when I see him in action, all the hard work shows. And it absolutely floors me.
Laz scares the fuck out of me, and whenever I read a piece featuring him or about him (like the most recent one), I am disturbed more than I can say. I don’t like how I feel after reading that, I feel sickened to my core and the rip and pop of muscles and tendons is a personal fear of mine— My gut’s churning again just thinking about it. She did a phenomenally good fucking job on this character and I continue to enjoy (apparently in some slightly self-masochistic way) watching him interact and function so static between the shredded fabric of his own reality.
Seriously bravo, Shamine.
Thanks for the
nightmares— I mean, show. Hell of a show.
(But your Widowmakers CAN GO RIGHT THE FUCK TO HELL, GODDAMNIT KILL IT WITH EVERY SINGLE KIND OF FIRE IN THE KNOWN UNIVERSE. )
2. Draw a figure using a reference
Holy shit those lips and that expression was the hardest goddamn thing I’ve ever done, I WANTED MORE THAN ANYTHING TO SWITCH THE LITTLE SMIRK to the OTHER side of her lips because that’s what I’m used to and it would have been easier, but I TRIED SO HARD NOT TO COP OUT and after an hour of redos, I think I finally fucking nailed it. ;.; Oh my god I’m so fucking proud *sob*
Yes I know I forgot the flower, shut up, the expression was seriously way more important to me.
AND LOOK, I DID A FUCKIN’ NOSE. A CUTE ONE AT THAT, HOT DANG. *collapses*